Political Coverage that Will Bite You (or that bites, not sure which)

What with Endangered Species Protection acts and the ever present prairie dog scandals, politicians represent not just humans, but all of us. Thus, let the election coverage begin!

However, we here at Animal Insider know that if you cared what some d-bag at a computer thought about current politics you read Drudge, or Wonkette, or, well, Drudge (he's dreamy). Thus, in keeping with our mission to fuck with species (its like fucking with gender only with fewer pinched testes) we present our two newest political correspondents: Charles, the donkey, and Richard, the elephant, er, libertarian.

Sent at 4:15 PM on Thursday
richard1999: how big is ron paul!!!!!!!!!
elephas: did you mean to message me that?
richard1999: yea
elephas: b/c i don't know
richard1999: word
elephas: i'll google it
richard1999: haha
excellent

Sent at 4:17 PM on Thursday
elephas: 9 and 3/4 inches
richard1999: bwaaa?
elephas: average length for white male is 6
so it's like he has a baby arm as a penis
richard1999: wow
i have a feeling that your not talking about ron paul anymore
elephas: i thought you meant ron jeremy
here i was risking my job
searching extremely not-safe-for-work stuff...

richard1999: hahaha
you didnt enjoy that?

elephas: who is ron paul?
richard1999: who is ron paul?????????
how can you NOT know about our next prez???
elephas: please. i'm voting obama you fool
and no i do not enjoy seeing just any old penis
richard1999: obama???

Update: Special Cleansing

Between organisms living in an ecosystem there exist many relationships, the most effective being, arguably, the mutualistic relationship in which two species go about their separate business but in effect their actions help each other. For example, bees and flowers, bee helps flower reproduce, bee gets the sweet sweet nectar.

You may recall yesterday we were talking about the capacity for human destruction, and how Turkey (a main hub for US military operations in the area) is considering entering Iraq to control Kurdish separatists, who have been fighting for an autonomous Kurdistan for, well, some time now.

Now, completely unrelated -- seriously, completely -- George W. Bush has come out against a US resolution declaring the Turkish massacre of Armenians (1915-1917) a genocide. Now, while, we as Americans can only be so self-righteous is shouting genocide when it periods of national construction (where did all the Indians go?); it has also been said that this resolution, if passed, would significantly derail bi-lateral Turkish-American relations and make it much more difficult for Turkey to resist public pressure not to cross into Iraq.

a) Does America want Turkey to invade Iraq? That certainly would help quash separatist tendencies...
b) If upsetting Turkey would be "very problematic" for US policy in the Middle East, materially, how dependent is the war in Iraq on Turkish compliance?
c) Who's gonna stand up and recognize the prairie dog genocide already?!?

Anyways, maybe I should start giving Bush more credit for understanding Biology...


Bush Warns Against Armenian Bill - bbc.com
Turkey Threatens Iraq Border Raid - bbc.com

Special Cleansing

Like Turks on Kurds and Serbs on Muslims, Colorado residents are decimating prairie dog populations. 12% of the Highland Ranch prairie dog population is to be "flushed out", asap.

I'm doing it. I'm crying genocide.


Turkey Threatens Iraq Border Raid - bbc.com
War in Bosnia and Herzegovina - wikipedia.org
Prairie Dog Removal Sparks Protest - 7 Denver News