Political Coverage that Will Bite You (or that bites, not sure which)

What with Endangered Species Protection acts and the ever present prairie dog scandals, politicians represent not just humans, but all of us. Thus, let the election coverage begin!

However, we here at Animal Insider know that if you cared what some d-bag at a computer thought about current politics you read Drudge, or Wonkette, or, well, Drudge (he's dreamy). Thus, in keeping with our mission to fuck with species (its like fucking with gender only with fewer pinched testes) we present our two newest political correspondents: Charles, the donkey, and Richard, the elephant, er, libertarian.

Sent at 4:15 PM on Thursday
richard1999: how big is ron paul!!!!!!!!!
elephas: did you mean to message me that?
richard1999: yea
elephas: b/c i don't know
richard1999: word
elephas: i'll google it
richard1999: haha
excellent

Sent at 4:17 PM on Thursday
elephas: 9 and 3/4 inches
richard1999: bwaaa?
elephas: average length for white male is 6
so it's like he has a baby arm as a penis
richard1999: wow
i have a feeling that your not talking about ron paul anymore
elephas: i thought you meant ron jeremy
here i was risking my job
searching extremely not-safe-for-work stuff...

richard1999: hahaha
you didnt enjoy that?

elephas: who is ron paul?
richard1999: who is ron paul?????????
how can you NOT know about our next prez???
elephas: please. i'm voting obama you fool
and no i do not enjoy seeing just any old penis
richard1999: obama???